With a bit of downtime, I reflected that I have quite a few little guidelines and mottos I carry with me, a toolkit that I’ve either stolen or learned through trial and (especially) error, but I've never formalised or written them down. These are no means complete or inflexible, and I can't claim to stick to them perfectly. It's something mainly for my own purposes that I will iterate on and tweak, but may be of interest to others.
In no particular order...
Be yourself
Working with children is a revelation because they have no filter for bullshit; they spot it a mile off if someone is fake, and they disengage. The penny drop moment is in realising adults are exactly the same, they just learn to mask it through experience.
You can be a slightly heightened and more outgoing version of you, but it still has to be the real you.
Swap problems for solutions, particularly solutions the players can provide themselves
Give people the chance to do it again
Believe in your ability to do your job
Know when to move on
Sing
Let the orchestra play as much as possible
Give people one clear thing to focus on at a time
Listen to what people have to say, but know when to move the conversation on
Momentum - pace and space
Stick to time
If you realise you were wrong and someone in the orchestra was right:
Be patient
Treat every problem as your own
Pick your battles
Don't be stingy with praise, but don't overdo it, either
It's not about you
Less is more
Don't be afraid to not have an answer right now
Give the orchestra everything they need and nothing they don't
Conduct the music
Keep it light and don’t take yourself too seriously
Talk to everyone
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